Why We Give (Part 3)

Memory. We all create memories every day. But what if you were told that your time to make memories was short? That the future you had planned was limited because the diagnosis you received was “not compatible with life”? What a phrase to hear about your child. One no one ever should. How do you create a lifetime of memories in moments and days instead of years? It’s an overwhelming question. When we were faced with it, we knew right away that we would need a lot of help. And those around us gathered up and carried us, without thought to their own grief. Our phenomenal nurses figured out a way for us to hold our son, which we hadn’t been able to do, despite 4 chest tubes and 2 ventilators. Our chaplain organized a baptism and broke all the NICU rules by filling the room with people who loved us and our son. Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep, a beautiful organization that provides professional photographs to families going through child loss at no charge, provided the amazing Megan Crown to gather images we will cherish forever. Friends lifted us up with thoughtful gestures, like bracelets and banners and clay for footprints and fingerprint necklaces and our son’s name on football helmets. We listened to Twins games and Vikings games and Skyped with far away family. We played the Beatles and learned that Bennie didn’t like when Ringo sang but loved I’ll Follow the Sun. We had beautiful, kind funeral directors who led us through the unthinkable process of burying our baby instead of bringing him home. We made memories. We are so very grateful for them and the opportunity to be surrounded by a community of love. We strive to give support to that community through Benton’s Hope by providing bereavement training for staff and access to objects and information that allow families to make their own. Because memories, while fleeting moments, are in fact what build the lives of those children that we miss so dearly. That is why we #give. #GivingHearts17 #GoMatchyMatchy#Feb9

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